Friday, June 23, 2006

Mad Cow Disease--darling disease of conspiracy theorists the world over . . . .

It's cause is unknown and its presence is undetectible until its symptoms manifest. Some claim that in a few decades, when the disease catches up to us (it usually takes 10-20 years to effect you) there will be a pandemic and countless millions will lose their minds and then their lives.

Nevermind that there's no hard date whatsoever to support this; it's scary and it drives traffic to their websites. That's all that really matters. Human beings love doomsday scenarios and tend to make mad guesses at what the next terrifying disease will be, when and where the next horrific terrorist attack will occur, when the volcano will erupt, the tsunami will hit, the earthquake will strike.

I want to inject prions directly into my brains just to display to you
the extent of my not giving a fuck. Let's look at the two
possibilities here:

1. Mad Cow Disease is a pandemic that will cause millions to lose
thier minds and then their lives.

2. Mad Cow Disease is yet another bullshit doomsday scenarion in the
same vein a Y2K, SARS, Anthrax, Monkey Pox, Killer Bees, West Nile
Virus, etc.

If 1 is the case, then why stop eating beef now? I eat beef nearly
daily, so why stop only to find out 10 years from now that I've got it
anyway. Why lament all those hamburgers I missed out on? If I'm going tolose all my memories as my mind deteriorates, at least let them be memories of big, juicy steaks.

If 2 is the case then NO ONE should give a shit.


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